Cordelia "Lia" Brooks (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
buddinghopes) wrote2020-05-28 10:11 pm
buddinghopes) wrote2020-05-28 10:11 pmOpen Post
A catch-all for miscellaneous threads and meme overflow!
buddinghopes) wrote2020-05-28 10:11 pm
no subject
not particularly in the way they all thought he was, but he is all but a shell of himself, walking emptily and heedlessly among them. his humanity had been sapped in the five years that they all went without seeing one another, and felix can only imagine how much blood he's spilled to get to this point. this is, quite frankly, what felix was afraid of, back when he'd seen dimitri's true nature for the first time.
he's never been one to express fear, though -- he's not one to express himself in general. but when lia finds him in the chapel, several feet away from the fallen prince himself... felix has a very perturbed look on his face. his arms are folded across his chest, and he's looking down at the ground. it isn't every day that you see felix hugo fraldarius with such an expression.
it's clear something's not right, and it isn't hard to guess what's bothering him. ]
no subject
[Some part of Lia can't help but think this may have been the logical conclusion, honestly. There were... signs, even back during their school days of course--you know, besides the glaring one in the Holy Tomb. Times when Dimitri's voice had that underlying growl that made her want to take several steps back from the prince. Talk of crushing skulls and severing limbs... that kind of bloodthirstiness chilled her to her core, to say the very least.
Take that, throw in the isolation and pain Dimitri must have gone through since... and it's no wonder this revenant of a man walks before them now.
... Worried as she is about Dimitri, that's not why she finds herself in the chapel. Felix cares, more than he'll ever admit, and Lia knows it. Felix is the one Lia worries about, and why she joins him in the chapel. She's silent for a lingering moment or two, before she finally speaks up.]
... Do you think he even registers we're here?
no subject
seems like she's going to get straight to the point, at least. that, he doesn't mind. at her question, he just scoffs, turning his head away from her a little. ]
I'd be surprised if he did. Who knows what's going through that twisted head of his, if not only bloodlust.
[ he lifts his head up, finally, and turns towards lia. his arms are still folded across his chest. ]
I knew that this day would come. And yet, seeing that pathetic face of his... It makes me sick.
no subject
[She closes her eyes and sighs. It's about the answer she expected--not that she was exactly hoping for anything better, because she's pretty sure Felix is completely correct. She hates this disappointed resignation she feels, but it's been a while since she's been particularly optimistic.
She runs a hand through her hair and looks over when Felix continues speaking.]
To be perfectly honest... I feel terrible for not being particularly surprised this happened. Sure, I was a little scared of him before, but... [She lowers her voice, what with Dimitri a few feet away--sure, he might not even be registering the two of them, but she's not sure she wants him to hear this anyway.] I'm more scared for us, at this point.
[She doesn't like admitting it, and that much is clear from her expression. Rather than saying anything else, she rests a hand lightly against his forearm. A silent expression that she's there for him. She's... not sure she can really do words for that right now. Nor does she want to.]
no subject
[ he says it immediately afterwards, and he shakes his head. ] I'll see this war through and fight until the bitter end with or without that creature.
[ said in his usual felix fashion: straight and to the point, and perhaps worded a little horribly. he means it, though, when he says she shouldn't be worried for him. he never liked it when people were. he can handle himself. and if he dies in this war, then that's that. he'll oppose the empire for the sake of those who are alive and trying to make it through, and selfishly to satisfy his desire to continue fighting. he can't see himself stopping anytime soon. even if dimitri were to die, even if they were to surrender, felix would not.
that's certainly cause for concern, but felix doesn't need any of it. yet, somehow, when her hand goes on his arm, he can't help but feel that her concern isn't necessarily unwanted. he sighs, turning his head away from her again. he doesn't respond to her touch...which is a sign in itself. ]
Why are you afraid?
no subject
... that this is for nothing. That he's going to get every last one of us killed while he's so fixated on his mountain of corpses that he can't see the living. [...] And... I'm afraid of losing you.
Perhaps it's a bit selfish of me, but...
... Well, it doesn't matter. Dwelling on the what-ifs never does any good, does it?
[And yet...]
I'll see this through, too. I have to.
no subject
[ her fears, that is, because he feels the same way. he's already thought of seeing every last one of his comrades get slaughtered, including lia, and it's a thought that he cannot bear. but he doesn't let that show. he doesn't speak of it. but he will acknowledge that how she's feeling isn't outrageous. ]
You're free to feel how you like, as long as you don't let that fear consume you.
[ he looks over at her. he didn't miss the part when she said she was afraid of losing him. ] ... Don't let it get you to make bad decisions in battle, either. Save yourself. No one can protect anybody if they're dead.
[ god dammit, felix. ]
no subject
[She thinks, for a moment, that maybe she should reassure him that she won't go dying on him, but... if fate is real, saying that sort of thing out loud would just be tempting it, wouldn't it? She's not inclined to jinx things and there's no wood around to knock on, just in case.]
Unlike some of the people around here, [not naming any names SYLVAIN] I do have some self-preservation. [She almost snorts, then she shakes her head.] I know what you're getting at, though. If it ever comes down to that sort of thing, I won't be an idiot.
[... That's not to say she won't make bad decisions entirely, but she's keenly aware of what she is and isn't capable of. And halfway decent at bullshitting.]
I'll do everything I can to live. I promise.
no subject
[ and judging by the way he says it, he means it, too. ]
That's more than what can be said for too many people we know.
[ sylvain, ingrid, mercedes, dedue...just to name a few. all willing to throw their lives away for the sake of someone else's. ridiculous. ]
If only that same sensibility could be knocked into the boar. Maybe then we wouldn't have to worry so much about our survival.
no subject
... It really is, isn't it.
[More of a statement than a question, and it's only the furrow of her brow that makes it clear just how alarmed she actually is. She loves her friends, but also, why are they like this.]
I'd say it wouldn't hurt to try, but we'd probably lose our hands for the trouble. Goddess knows I've been tempted to cuff him upside the head a few times since I got here.
[She's not tall enough to reach...]
no subject
[ not now, anyway. there's a hint of pain behind the way felix says that, but he just shrugs as if he could care less -- it's clear that isn't the case. ]
I'm going to get something to eat. The longer I stay here, the sicker I feel.
[ he turns towards the exit, but he lingers for a little while. it's...a silent way of asking her if she wants to join him. ]
no subject
[Yeah, she knows damn good and well he does care. She casts one last look at Dimitri and makes a face, before turning to follow.
There's nothing to be done for now. It's useless to stay here.
She easily falls into step beside Felix with a gait significantly less bouncy than it was five years ago. She tucks a stray lock of hair behind her ear.]
... Food sounds good right now, yeah. And I think the special today's the spicy fish and turnip stew. Least, that's what it smelled like when I poked my head in there earlier.
no subject
It'll do, I suppose.
[ that's all he has to say about it, apparently. he keeps walking. ]
no subject
[Oof.
Then again, it's not like she doesn't get it. She nods as she walks beside him, quiet.
It takes her a while to speak up again.]
... I was thinking about seeing about doing some weapon maintenance after. Want to join me?
[It's... well, it's productivity. But Felix knows by now that Lia's the type who works to get her mind off of trouble, doesn't he?]
no subject
[ so, yes. yes, he does want to join her. his weapon's alright as is, but eh. some extra polishing wouldn't hurt. ]
We'll need all the maintenance we can get, knowing the situation we're in now.
no subject
Yup. Gotta be prepared for anything.
[She's got a bow and a sword to take care of and... maybe some of what's being kept around could use some upkeep, too.
She runs a hand through her hair and sighs. What a mess they've found themselves in.]
Might take inventory while we're there. Pretty sure we're not short on anything, but...
[Okay, that's definitely busywork.]
no subject
[ that'd be bad!! obviously.
anyway, they're finally at the dining hall. felix heads to the counter where the special's being served. he loves this dish, but not even the enticing smell of that stew seems to lift his spirits like it typically does. still though, he seems a little more placated than earlier.
he takes a seat at the edge of one of the dining tables. ]
no subject
[Obviously!! But better over-prepared than unprepared, that's what Lia thinks.
She follows him to the counter and--okay, this dish isn't exactly her top favorite or anything, but... usually, she's happier to see Felix enjoying it. All things considered, maybe 'placated' is the best she can hope for in these circumstances. She wanders over to the same dining table to sit across from Felix.
... She actually is more hungry than she thought she was, at least.]